Despite the constant growth of new online dating platforms, dating has still become very challenging for many guys.
These guys have had to deal with catfishing, ghosting, stress, anxiety, and a variety of other problems that come along with entering the wonderful world of dating.
Let’s talk much more about why so many guys have thrown in the towel when it comes to dating.
7 Reasons Why Guys Give Up On Dating
It’s easy to see why so many guys have given up on dating; it’s become more stressful, dating apps can be a nightmare, and they’re fed up with all of the struggles and failures.
That’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to why so many guys are throwing in the dating towel, and I personally don’t blame them.
Let’s talk much more about the reasons as to why they’ve given up.
1) Dating Is Very Stressful (And Has Become Harder)
For a lot of guys, the process of dating is about as nerve-wracking as can be. There are just so many things that they need to get right, and the pressure is at an all-time high for them.
There’s a quote that I really like that you can relate to anyone dating:
In life, what you really want will never come easy.
This is especially true to the fact that dating is never going to come easy. I think that a lot of men (women too) often forget that dating isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows.
While dating certainly isn’t easier, at the same time, it’s become much harder over time.
From a guy’s perspective, just think about everything that he has to do when it comes to the dating process:
- Put himself in the right place to meet the right woman, at the right time.
- Muster up the confidence to approach her and strike a conversation.
- Don’t forget about keeping a conversation with a complete stranger.
All at the same time, he has to wonder if she is interested in him, if she already has a boyfriend, or if she’s just talking to him so that she doesn’t have to completely reject him and walk away.
That’s only the process for meeting and getting to know someone, too. Don’t forget about getting her number, picking a place to go on a date, wondering what to say, what to do, etc.
These are examples of dating in person, and something else to keep in mind is that the current state of the world has also made dating 10 times harder (for both men and women).
Luckily, there is also the ability to utilize a plethora of dating apps in order to find the right person. However, that’s not exactly going to be a cakewalk for guys as well. Let’s find out why.
2) Dating Apps Are A Serious Problem
With so many people using dating apps, you would think that it would be much easier to date nowadays, but that’s not how it has been for many guys nowadays.
If you spend only a little amount of time on dating apps, you’ll quickly soon realize that there are a lot of problems with putting yourself on big dating app platforms.
I’ve had this problem myself, and I’ve seen dating apps from the guy’s perspective too, and it isn’t always pretty how people act, or what they do on those apps.
Here are some of the big problems that guys are tired of running into on dating apps.
Thanks to the wonderful world of social media, big platforms have become more and more about status, attention, and fame.
Unfortunately, when it comes to dating apps, you often see the same type of scenarios play out in similar ways to how people interact on the internet. Here are two very big examples:
- Girls telling the guy to follow them on Instagram then ghosting.
- Girls hitting the heart with everyone to brag about how many matches they have.
The problem with all of those scenarios is that they have nothing to do with genuinely being interested in the guy, and ultimately going on a date with him.
It’s all about clout, popularity, and fame, and because of that, the guy gets damaged in the process. If you put yourself in the guy’s shoes, would want to deal with any of that?
Catfishing is the process of luring someone online, most specifically on a date, through the use of using different pictures or inaccurately describing themself.
I almost forgot to mention, it’s also a very big problem when it comes to online dating. You might as well call this the process of conning someone because the person is ultimately lying about:
- Their appearance/looks.
- What they do for a living.
- What they like to do for fun.
To make matters worse, sometimes people will actually create these types of profiles in order to get money out of the person on the other side. It’s pathetic.
All in all, many guys have been lied to/deceived when it comes to fake online profiles. In fact, I know a couple of guys who ended up going on dates with someone who catfished them.
The thing that I wondered to myself is this:
How on Earth did these women think that the guy would stick around, especially when they built the potential relationship on a house of lies?
While I’d prefer that they keep pushing through the resistance, examples like this made me better understand why so many men have thrown in the towel when it comes to online dating.
The art of real conversation seems to be declining, and for many men, it seems to have been replaced with the “subtle” art of ghosting.
Ghosting is when you completely stop talking to a person at a specific time in the conversation, and it’s done for no rhyme or reason.
Don’t expect an explanation either, because that’s what ghosting is all about; radio silence.
Here is why ghosting can become so frustrating for many men who are serious about dating:
- A girl opens up, he responds, and then she never responds back (very common).
- A guy and girl are having a great conversation, and out of nowhere, blocked.
- A guy goes on a date, he thanks her for the date, then she ghosts him.
It seems that people are taking more pleasure in ghosting, blocking, and throwing any subtle sign of a challenge in the future out, like yesterday’s garbage.
Both men and women are guilty of this, but men are seeing it happen more often (especially on dating apps), and it’s gotten very old, very quickly, for them.
Here’s something else that has been piling up when it comes to dating, but online and offline.
3) Constant And Continuous Failure
When you experience constant and continuous failure with anything in life, especially dating, then you’re much more likely to give up.
To put yourself in the guys’ shoes, here are examples (some of which were mentioned previously) when it comes to the type of failures that he has to deal with:
- Constantly getting ghosted.
- Not getting many great matches.
- Striking conversations and getting rejected.
- A girl not wanting to go on another date with the guy.
- Getting catfished (this is less of failure and more of extreme frustration).
Don’t forget about the arguments, disagreements, and drama that can occur through conversations.
While some of these instances are a natural part of dating, it can get very annoying for guys when they keep running through the same failures without getting what they want.
4) Nice Guys Do End Up Finishing Last
Many guys have realized that being nice just doesn’t cut it anymore, and the same goes with chivalry. It’s as if these nice guys are getting run over by the jerks of the world.
Many women are famous for talking about how they want a nice guy. Someone who will be kind to them, take care of them and be with them by their side when they need them the most.
But how often does this actually happen? Ask a guy who has given up on dating and he will blatantly tell you:
Nice guys finish last, and there’s nothing more to say about that.
It’s easy to see that perspective too because there are plenty of girls out there who have completely abandoned the nice guy. And so what do they go for instead?
- The jerk.
- The player.
- The bad boy.
- The guy who treats them like dirt.
- The guy who has more problems than he knows how to handle.
It’s still easy to see how a nice guy would want to pull the plug on his dating life, especially when he’s getting walked on and pushed aside, thanks to girls choosing the jerk over him.
These jerks are the types of guys who date multiple women at the same time, too.
5) Not Ready For Anything Long Term
Imagine having a date go perfectly. Everything clicked, everything was pure magic. Then only, in the end, the girl tells the guy that she doesn’t want anything long-term.
On one hand, you have plenty of guys that don’t want anything long-term. They are usually all about hooking up, having friends with benefits, or maybe just being friends.
However, girls aren’t absent from partaking in these types of activities too, and it’s a very big nuisance when it comes to a guy finding the right girlfriend for them.
These types of activities, once again, are more about:
- Elevating one’s social status.
- Creating moments to “brag” about on social media.
- And of course, there’s also the option of growing the good ol’ follower account.
Girls who go on a date with someone and then tell the guy that they don’t want to do anything long-term is childish, immature, and need to grow up, effective immediately. Guys are sick of it.
6) Other Things Are More Important At The Time
Guys have given up on dating because there are just more important things to do with their time. If dating hasn’t been fun, then why would they continue to do it?
I’ve talked about a lot of the failures and rejections that often occur when it comes to dating online and offline. These types of failures cut like a knife.
On the other hand, what doesn’t cut like a knife are fun activities that the guys can be partaking in. Do you think that a guy would rather keep trying to date, or do something different such as:
- Playing sports.
- Playing video games.
- Working on a side hustle.
- Hanging out with his friend.
- Working to make some more money (he might love his job).
The fact of the matter is that eventually, the guy is going to say:
Screw it, I have better things to do with my time…
And he wouldn’t be wrong either, especially when you realize what he’s had to go through in order to find a great girl to call his girlfriend.
7) Being Alone Has Been Better
It’s unfortunate to hear, but sometimes, the guy realizes that just being alone will be a much better option than trying to make the most out of dating.
I don’t like hearing this because I am a firm believer in the fact that you can always find someone for you, even if it takes a lot more time and effort to find them.
On the other hand, many guys have succumbed to the fact that being alone is just a better option or even justification. From their perspective, the guy:
- Won’t need to stress over dating.
- Won’t have to deal with catfishing and ghosting.
- He will be able to focus on activities and hobbies that make him happy.
- He will also be able to save money in the process (since he won’t be going on dates).
Once again, do you blame many guys for wanting to be alone when they get so much more out of it when compared to playing the dating game?
Is It Normal To Want To Give Up On Dating? Final Words
It is, in fact, completely normal to want to give up on dating. It can be quite a stressful process. Don’t forget about all of the problems and challenges that you have to deal with.
Throughout this article, I’ve talked about how challenging dating can be, and I’ve always talked about my empathy for many men who have given up on dating.
I do also want to state that it is sometimes okay to take a break from the current dating scene, and I even recommend it to anyone who has no desire to date anymore.
Sometimes, some of the problems can keep piling up, and it gets to the point where you don’t want to keep dealing with them. Some of these problems include:
- People being rude.
- A lack of genuine conversation.
- As well as a lack of genuine connections.
So while it is perfectly normal to want to give up on dating, I would recommend instead that you take a little break.
Clear your head, spend some time doing something that you love, and then you can come back to the dating scene with a clear mind.
As long as you accept the fact that dating can come with quite a few challenges, then it will allow you to expect the speedbumps that randomly appear throughout your journey.
As mentioned earlier; In life, what you really want will never come easy, and the same thought rings true when it comes to dating.